Sweet Date Honey

“There are no short cuts.”

The biggest gift I received in my observant Jewish lifestyle is the freedom from feeling that I will never be good enough.

I go at my own pace with 💯 faith that everything unfolds at the correct time on a timeline and that is Hashem’s timeline. I am only on his schedule. I do the best that I can and that is good enough.

Thank you Hashem

“Speak, Don’t Strike” — A Personal Reflection on the 5th of Tammuz

Today’s parsha reminds me that even Moshe Rabbeinu — the greatest of leaders — had a moment where he acted from pressure, frustration, or instinct rather than full alignment with Hashem’s will. And the consequence wasn’t just about water from a rock — it was about missing a deeper moment of connection, of emunah, and of divine presence.

So what does this mean for me today?

• I need to stay in a place of listening.
  Not just hearing — but being receptive. Sometimes Hashem’s guidance is soft, not dramatic. If I rush, react, or try to “force the outcome,” I might miss the quiet but powerful invitation to trust.
• I need to be careful with my speech.
  The difference between hitting and speaking is the difference between control and partnership. My words can create peace, blessing, understanding — or the opposite. Hashem didn’t want power from Moshe; He wanted connection. So too, my words today matter. I want them to reflect calm, faith, and sensitivity.
• I need to trust — truly trust — that Hashem is guiding me.
  Even when I don’t see it immediately. Even when things are uncertain. Bitachon means I don’t need to “hit” the situation — I can speak, pray, listen, and trust that Hashem is already preparing the flow I need. Gently. Faithfully.

Thank You for this beautiful day and the precious opportunity to make a Kiddush Hashem.
Thank You for my smart, energetic, and beautiful children—I love them so very much.

Like Moshe, may I not strike the rock in moments of frustration,
but hold myself with patience and trust,
allowing these moments of flusteredness to pass gently.

May I remain in a place of calm, flow, receptivity,
deep connection to myself and my children.
May I trust every moment as it comes.

May this day be filled with grace, love, purpose, and connection.
May I take every opportunity to sanctify You and Your Name.
May it be a true Kiddush Hashem.

Amen.

Gimmel Tammuz – A Day of Sweetness and Soul

I didn’t realize it was Gimmel Tammuz until I had already gone to bed Saturday night. I woke up and read on my phone that the holy day had begun. I had thought it was the next day. Somehow, that unknowing made what unfolded feel even more sacred—like a gift that revealed itself slowly, from the inside out.

In the middle of the night, our sweet Abby (4) came into bed with us. She wanted to snuggle. And those snuggles… they were pure sweetness. The love I felt holding her is something I can’t fully explain. It was a kind of love that opens you—completely softens you.

Later that day, I took the kids to a friend’s birthday party. The drive wasn’t easy—we encountered many obstacles. But I called her and spoke with both her and her husband. Thank God, we made it.

And I’m so glad we did. The party was lovely. I felt respected, appreciated, and seen. After some delicious pizza, I felt recharged and able to bring my best self. Elisha was there—it was so nice to connect. Such a special neshama. He asked about our new place. I really like him.

I connected with the kids and several of the adults. I had meaningful conversations—emotionally and mentally engaged. Someone poured me a lechaim. Through it all, I stayed humble, honest, authentic, and open.

I had a moving conversation with Simon, the father of Annie (one of Abby and Joey’s schoolmates). It turns out his mother is Jewish. We spoke about what that means for him, and I was able to share my excitement for his journey. It touched me deeply.

I ended up staying among the last guests—helping Elisha and K clean up. It felt really good to be of service.

Driving Abby and Joey home, I could tell they had an amazing time. They each had two homemade fruit popsicles—strawberry mango. Joey cracked me up saying, “Who gave Joey two popsicles?” He always makes me laugh. They left with bath toys and an Elsa frisbee. They rode bikes and scooters with the other kids. They felt appreciated, seen. It was so healthy. I felt relieved and grateful.

When we got home, Yehoshua was there. The house was spotless—he had been working and still was. I’m thankful for that moment of quiet care.

Later in the afternoon, I left for Bet Tikvah around 5:40 and got there by 6:10. The air around the shul was sweet and still. Freshly bloomed roses, peace surrounding everything. I said to Rabbi A, “The energy here is beautiful.” And it really was.

I helped Rabbi S, Rabbi A, and later K as she arrived. I began to greet guests.

The first was Yyves B—maybe in his 60s, strong and kind. I kept wondering about his story. Eventually, he shared: he had been into Christianity but had been following Rabbi Skobac and was searching for something true. This was his first time at Bet Tikvah. I cried when he told me. I was so moved by his courage and openness.

Then Penny. We had a heart-to-heart. And KM—a new widow, having just lost her husband, a Kohen. I gave her a long hug, 30 seconds and kisses on both cheeks. It was sacred.

Then came a new person I hadn’t yet met – L, travelling by bike. I may have opened the door or maybe he remembered the code. He asked me my name, where I live, my story. I told him: we live in Alta Vista but are moving to Carlingwood. I met Yehoshua in Israel. I shared how davening with Chabad feels like home because that’s how I first learned.

He responded with such presence. “That’s a wonderful story—thank you so much for sharing it with me.” He said it with sincerity, and it touched me deeply. I put my hand on my heart and smiled—fully and openly, with my eyes and my soul.

On the drive home, Hashem and the Rebbe had one more gift for me: a breathtaking pink and orange sunset over a still river with a sliver of the moon in the sky and a bird floating quietly by…I felt so deeply moved by the beauty of it all.

Thank you, sweet Rebbe, for the gifts you gave me all day. I love you.

Love,
Tamar

My husband got me a WordPress subscription since I’m constantly sharing words of Torah around the house.

Thank you Yehoshua